


sex in the cunty

by ficpucs



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Bio queens, F/F, Lesbian AU, New York Queens, Smut, Sort of like queer as folk but with drag queen, They are all ladies and all gay
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-26
Updated: 2018-05-26
Packaged: 2019-05-13 22:48:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14757764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ficpucs/pseuds/ficpucs
Summary: what bob talked about on hey qween about meeting Cracker basically, after that aquaria comes inalso bob and cracker aren’t together for the whole thing





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic so sorry if it’s not completely on point but I think Bob and Crackers relationship is really interesting so here it is. Parts of this story are from an interview Cracker did before drag race where she talked about this and other things I’ve heard about them. I don’t ship bob and Cracker because they’re family and that’d be gross, just wanted to write abt it. Also they’re real women because it’s easier to write about something I’m familiar with.

(crackers POV)

I can’t find mirth or excitement in anything anymore. I really never could. When I moved to New York, that was what I hoped to change. I was so sick of Seattle and all the bad memories it gave me. I had to get out, I had to find something to live for. I don’t know why I thought this would be any better than Seattle was. Sure it’s a new place, with new people. But I’m still the same: worthless, lazy, a bottom. I know I’m talented. Still, none of that matters here. I want to be a writer but the cold truth is that no one cares. It’s hard to admit but that’s really the bona fide of this city. Unless you’re hot or rich, no one gives a shit. 

As she closes her journal, Brianna lets out a deep sigh. Another addition to her millions of sappy entrees that will never be read by anyone except herself. 

What am I doing with my life? My only two emotions are sad and horny. 

And right now the second emotion is a little more prevalent. Her hair is already done, Brianna loved to do hair but never thought about it as something serious. She threw on a neutral pink cardigan that was about 3 sizes too large over her light wash, high waisted jeans and a lacy white tank top that almost looked like something you would find in the lingerie isle. A minimalistic gold necklace hung form her neck, drawing attention to her chest and collarbone. She slipped on a pair of short, block heels and walked out of her tiny apartment. 

As she made her way down the dirty New York street, she spotted a dark skinned, tall looking woman. She fit the description of Brianna’s typical hook up almost perfectly. She was moving a bookshelf up to what was probably her apartment. Eager for some action, Brianna strutted over and offered to help. 

“Here, I’ll help you with that.”

“You look like you’re 80 pounds, are you sure?”

“Oh yeah I used to be a black belt in karate. Breaking boards and shit.”

“Come on black belt!”

“What?”

The girl started to laugh. “Oh, uh nothing. It’s just an inside joke.”

Brianna was surprisingly strong for how small she was. She was 5’5 but still had some muscle. Eventually, they got the bookcase up the stairs to her apartment. 

“Thanks for helping me, what did you say your name was?”

“I didn’t say my name, but I’m Brianna. I live down the street in the complex next door.”

The girl laughed. Usually people don’t laugh at Brianna’s snarky comments. “I’m bob. I know it’s not a very feminine name, you can blame my liberal-ass parents.”

Bob walked around her apartment as they continued to chat and Brianna just followed until they reached her bedroom. It went silent for a moment but then Brianna picked the conversation right back up.

“I just moved here actually. To pursue a career in journalism and write for newspapers.”

“What do you write about?”

“A lot of political issues. I’m really into that.”

Bob came closer to Brianna and started to play with the little gold necklace she had, inching her fingers closer to her breasts.

“Mhm?”

Brianna has been here before. She knew what was going to happen next so she inched closer to Bob. The shorter girl looked up and was pulled into a deep kiss. Brianna only moaned a little as she was pulled onto Bobs bed. She straddled herself onto bobs lap without breaking the kiss. Her cardigan fell down her shoulders and onto the bed. 

“I’m not wearing anything under this.”

Brianna whispered into Bobs ear, her almost wet pussy grinding against the taller girls stomach. 

“Can I take them off for you then?”

Brianna nodded. “Only if you take yours off first.” Bob wasn’t wearing a bra, to crackers delight. Then she pulled her lacy tank over her head, revealing her perfect breasts and flat tummy. Brianna could tell tingles running through her whole body as Bob unzipped her pants to see her clean area. She got off Bobs lap and laid flat on the bed. Comepletely vulnerable to whatever could happen. 

“Open your legs.”

Brianna did as she was told. Bob made her way down, leaving kisses on her thighs until she finally reached her pussy. Bob moved her tounge around, feeling Brianna’s wet clit. Brianna could feel vibrations as she moaned through her. 

“Oh, fuck. I want you in me, please.”

Bob slipped two fingers into Brianna who moaned, almost screamed in response. She didn’t expect two at once. She could feel them moving faster and faster as Bob slipped in one more finger. At this point Brianna had reached her climax. One hand was in Bobs dark hair, the other grasping for life onto the sheets. Bob pulled her fingers out, they were both exhausted.


	2. meeting aquaria

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brianna (cracker) and aquaria meet  
> Brianna also finds out something very interesting about bob

Brianna woke up after falling asleep for a couple of hours. It was still daytime. She walked around the apartment but couldn’t find bob. She put on one of Bobs sweaters and some boy shorts, they were the only things she could find that fit her. She scavenged the apartment for a wallet or some cash. Brianna knew it wasn’t right, obviously. But she had rent to pay just like everyone else and she wasn’t earning money from writing. There was a knock on the door. Thinking it was Bob, Brianna answered. It wasn’t Bob. It was another beautiful girl. She looked completely model-material with her platinum blonde hair and perfect nose. 

“Hi, um, is Bob here?”

“No she’s not sorry.”

“Crap, okay. Can I come in? I need to borrow something of hers.” 

“I guess, who are you?” 

“I’m aquaria. Who are you? Just another one of Bobs random chicks?”

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“Oh. Well, I’m Brianna. I’m Bobs friend.”

This was obviously a lie. 

“No you’re not. I know why you’re here, it’s fine. I really don’t care if you’re a prostitute. I’m a model so I understand.”

“Oh, no I’m not a prostitute.”

Brianna didn’t quite understand this girl but she didn’t care because it didn’t seem like they would be meeting again. Then they both heard the lock on the door shake and Bob walked in. Brianna was planning on being all cute and laying on the couch or something when Bob came back but here she was and there was someone else in the house. 

“Aquaria get out I’m not letting you borrow a wig!”

Aquaria snorted and laughed. She kept laughing but Bob didn’t look as happy. Soon enough, aquaria shuffled out of the apartment without a wig. 

“Sorry about that.”

“No it’s fine. She was entertaining.”

Bob laughed.

“So I was walking around, and I was just wondering. What are all the wigs and costumes for?”

“Oh, I’m a drag queen.”

Brianna had never met a drag queen before. Especially not one who was already a woman. 

“Oh, that’s interesting.”

“Yeah, I get it. It’s really different. It’s cool if you want to leave.”

“Oh no way! I still had a good time with you. I’ve just never seen a drag queen before.”

“Then you should come to our show tonight! It could be so much fun!”

“Yeah sure, I’d love to come. I’ll see you then. I left my number on your nightstand.”

With that, Brianna left to go home and get ready to go back out.


	3. Chapter 3

Brianna is digging through her closet for what to wear. Since she moved to New York, she hasn’t been motivated to get dressed up for anything or even go out. She pulled out a skin tight, light pink dress with strappy shoulders and some clear heels. She didn’t know anything about drag culture. But she was about to find out. 

Bob texted her the clubs address. When Brianna arrived, the show hadn’t started yet and sun was just setting so not many people were inside. She walked around the club. It felt like walking around a pub before happy hour. Eventually she made her way to the back where she found the girl’s dressing room. She knocked on the door. After hearing a few muffled footsteps, the door opened and she was greeted by a girl who looked like Bobs sister.

“Hi, do you need something?”

“Is Bob here?”

The Bob look-alike turned her head back to the other girls in the room. 

“Bob, someone’s here for you.”

“Oh, that’s Brianna. Let her in.”

The door opened all the way and it was kind of like what Brianna expected. Bob and aquaria were sitting in front of big mirrors painting their faces. Behind them was a rack too small for all the costumes and outfits it had hung on it. Shoes and alcohol were scattered throughout the room. 

“Hey brianna, that’s Monet. She’s another one of the queens in the show.” 

“Oh cool, thanks for introducing me. So am I too early?” 

“Oh no you’re fine. If you want to go get a drink just tell them bob sent you.”

“If I get a drink now I probably won’t last through the whole night.” 

... 

After hours of chatting with the girls and watching them do their makeup, Brianna has already learned more about drag and New York. She’s also noticed one of the other girls eyeing her the whole time. She didn’t mind it. Aquaria was beautiful, even if she was a few years younger. Only problem is, Brianna’s never topped before and this girl was obviously not a top. It was almost time for Bob to go on stage. She was doing a stand up comedy set with Monet and aquaria would be lip syncing to some Gaga song Brianna didn’t really care about. Bob and Monet were hilarious and everyone loved them. But when Brianna watched aquaria with her arms folded the whole time, she didn’t expect to be so mesmerized by her. 

Aquaria was like the goddess Gaga was singing about in the song. Now she had no problem becoming a top if it meant she could top her. After the show was over Brianna made her way through the crowd of drunk straight girls and gays back to the girl’s dressing room. As they de-dragged, she told them how good their performances were. When bob was fully out of drag, Brianna flirtatiously whispered in her ear

“Am I coming home with you after the show?”

“I’m really tired, next time though. I’ll save my energy for you.”

She kissed Brianna on the head and left with Monet. It was just her and Aquaria now. 

“So, what really is going on with you and bob, it doesn’t seem like a hookup.”

“I don’t know. I’m not sure why she wanted me to come here. It’s not like I didn’t have fun. It’s just weird for me to have sex with someone and for them to want to hang out with me as a person. But, can I be honest with you?”

“Yeah of course.”

“I don’t think I like bob any further than in bed. She’s just a big personality and I need someone more reserved.”

“I know what you’re saying.”

“Thanks. Hey, um, can I come home with you, I just don’t want to call a cab this late.”

“It’s only 11:40.”

“I know.”

“Oh, well yeah.”

Brianna was sort of scared of what could happen on cabs late at night in New York, but she also really wanted to be with this girl. They left the club and hitched a cab to aquarias apartment. 

“If you want you can borrow some clothes to sleep in. I’m gonna get ready for bed.”

...

Brianna wrote in her journal:

That was it. Nothing happened. I just slept on her couch and woke up and left. I don’t know what we did wrong. I’ll probably just go back to bob.


	4. up in the gig

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cracker gets dragged up by the girls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a really short chapter, but the next one should be really long I just need this to carry the plot along, and soon the plot will be craquaria so don’t worry lol   
> Also I have finals this week so updates might be slow but thank you for all the love, it means a lot and thank you @dizzymisssally for all the help!

That dull night with aquaria, Brianna didnt think things would go any further between them. But it only made her hungrier for the other girl, because with every glance they shared, it felt like they were as close as Brianna and bob had been. Speaking of Bob, Brianna was going to see another one of her shows tonight. Which meant she would also be seeing aquaria. Then she got an unexpected call from Bob:

_Hey Brianna, I have this crazy idea, but I think it’ll be so sick._

_What is it?_

_So I was thinking we should put you in drag tonight! You have the perfect face for it._

_I don’t know, I don’t like preforming._

_Don’t worry girl, you don’t have to get on stage, but drag does transform you. You might change your mind once you’re in the full getup._

_I mean, I guess so._

_Yes! It’ll be so sick don’t worry._

_Okay, see you then._

_Bye girl!_

Brianna hung up. She didn’t have a huge problem with putting on a wig and a pair of lashes, her problem was losing the sexual connection she had with Bob. Maybe it was for the best, she wanted to be with aquaria anyway. 

...

When she opened the door of the clubs dressing room, Bob was setting up an outfit (most likely for her because it looked way to small for Bob), Monet was prancing around, and Aquaria was silently applying her makeup. 

_Brianna!_

Bob ran over to give her a hug. 

_Hey, so what’s going to happen?_

_Okay, Aquaria’s gonna do your face, and then I’ll give you some hair and an outfit._

_Cool, um Aquaria where do you want me to sit?_

The thought of Aquaria touching her face released all the stress she had about this. 

_Right here is fine._

Brianna sat down.

_How long do you think this’ll take?_

_For you, just an hour or two. Why? Do you not want me touching your face for too long or something?_

_Oh no, I don’t have a problem with it, I was just curious._

_Sorry girl, Aquaria gets really bitchy with new people._

Monet chimed in,

_Didn’t they sleep together last night? Doesn’t sound very new to me._

_Anyway, I’m gonna glue down your brows first so I can draw over them, this is what will probably take the longest._

_Okay, cool._

Brianna got goosebumps every time aquaria did anything to her. It felt like sex, but Brianna kept telling herself, it’s just makeup. 

_Whoops, sorry I just messed up on your lip. Monet do you have any makeup remover? I left mine at home._

_No girl sorry, just use your spit._

Aquaria took her ring finger to her tounge and then wiped off the messed up lipstick on Brianna’s mouth. _It’s just makeup._ She thought.

_Okay, I’m done._

Brianna turned around to see a WOMAN in the mirror. 

_Oh my god! I’m a woman! Aquaria how did you do this?_

_Years of practice and natural talent._

The two other queens came over to see.

_She is a woman!_

_We need a drag name for you._

_What about Brianna Cracker! Like Bree on a cracker?_

_Oh my god, that is so awful but I’m keeping it._

Brianna truly didn’t expect to have this much fun, this is the happiest she’s been in a long time. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aquaria was half a virgin when she met Brianna.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally craquaria! Sorry for taking so long to update but it’s finally here.

**Bob:** Hey Cracker, are you coming again tonight?

 **Brianna:** Yes.

 **Bob:** Okay cool, Aquaria isn’t preforming tonight but she said you could come over to her place and she could beat you

 **Brianna:** Sounds good. And is ‘beat’ another drag term? 

 **Bob:** Oh yeah I forgot you’re still a drag fetus. I gave Aquaria your number so she’ll text you her address

 **Brianna:** Why did you give aquaria my number?

 **Bob:** She asked for it

 **Brianna:** Oh, cool. I’ll see you tonight.

 **Bob:** See you tonight

What? Why would Aquaria ask for Brianna’s number and why wouldn’t she ask Brianna herself? Her train of thought stopped when she received a text from a strange number, guessing it was aquaria.

 **Aquaria:** hey, this is aquaria 

After she got the girls address, she headed over. She lived in an apartment complex similar to her own, it was a little dirtier. She knocked on the door and was greeted by a more natural looking aquaria. She was wearing her dark hair down and a cropped tank top, her nipples portruding through the fabric and grey heathered shorts. 

_Sorry my apartments always a mess._

_Oh no, it’s fine._

_Anyway, you can come in._

Brianna walkedthrough the door way. 

_So I’m going to do your makeup in my room, that’s where it’s all set up. You can go up I’ll be right there._

She made her way over to aquarias room, it was sort of what she expected for someone like aquaria. It was edgy but comforting and clean but cluttered. Then aquaria joined her.

_You can sit down here._

_You have a lot of make up._

_I also have a lot of sugar daddies._

Brianna stared in awe at her. 

_I’m joking._

_Yeah, I figured. How long have you been doing this?_

_Makeup?_

_Mhm._

_Uh, probably like 7th grade. But I always loved makeup, I loved getting my face painted._

_7th grade? That’s crazy. How old did you say you were?_

_22._

_You’re only 22?_

_Is there a problem with that?_

_No I just didn’t know you were so much younger than me._

_Oh well,_

Aquaria leaned down to whisper into the older girl’s ear. 

_I like older women._

_You don’t say?_

_They know how to treat me right._

Her hands crept down toward Brianna’s breasts who then leaped out of the chair and went to grasp on aquarias face, pulling in for a long, passionate, kiss. Brianna opened her mouth, letting in aquarias tongue. She could feel her letting out little moans. They backed onto the bed and separated for a quick moment. 

_Brianna, can I tell you something?_

_Anything._

_I’ve never done this with another girl before._

_Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you._

With that, Aquaria pulled off her top and untied the draw string on her shorts, and then slid them off. Then Brianna did the same. Aquaria straddled her thighs and they continued to make out. Brianna trailed bites and kisses down aquarias jawline, to her collar bone, and then to her perky breasts. She licked from the bottom of aquarias nipple to the top, and cupped her lips around it. She did the same to both. 

_Brianna._

This was a signal to go further. She trailed her mouth down to aquarias throbbing pussy and kissed the opening.

_Do you really want this?_

_Yeah, I do._

Aquarias words were breathy and full of lust. 

_Will you scream for me?_

_I will._

Brianna slid her tongue into aquarias clit. Aquarias response was the best sound she’s heard in months. She then lifted her fingers to the other girls mouth and told her to suck. They locked eyes as she did this. When Aquaria let go, Brianna slid in her index finger. Loud, broken moans left aquaria. She slid in another finger, and started to move them up and down, feeling aquarias tightness.

_Brianna,_

_Bri, oh fuck Brianna_  

_Brianna, I’m gonna cum_

She slid in one last finger and aquaria reached her climax. Brianna has never heard her name screamed so loud. She pulled out, and laid next to aquaria.

_I’m never fucking a guy or anyone my age ever again._

_I’m glad you liked it._

_You heard me._

They were too exauhsted to get back up and do anything. Brianna just fell asleep with aquaria in her arms.

 


End file.
